It was the day before Thanksgiving and I was stuck in the waiting room at the doctor's office for over an hour. It's not the first time I've fallen victim to the doctor scheduling appointments for times when he's not actually in the office. It was clear that he wasn't there, because it was 8:30 in the morning and I had scheduled the first appointment of the day. There were six of us in the waiting room, the same six, for the entire time. No one got called in. We simply waited and waited an waited. And I just sat there, getting more and more irritated.
Finally, after well over an hour, I was the first one called into the exam room. It took the doctor less than three minutes to give me a clean bill of health and allow me to go on with my day; after paying my $40 copay of course.
Rewinding a bit, there was a girl who was on her cell phone for the entire time I was waiting. Of the six of us in the room, she was the only person who's voice I heard for over an hour. There was no sign that said "No Cell Phones," but you'd think people should have some common courtesy, right? She was definitely talking to her boyfriend because she kept referring to him as "babe", which is one of my biggest pet peeves. I don't care how in love you are, referring to your significant other as "babe" is the verbal equivalent of nails on a chalkboard. Anytime I ever hear anyone use that particular pet name, I want to punch the person in the face. Ugh...
Anyway, she was making him believe that she was at work and not the doctor's office. He was obviously surprised that she didn't have the day off because she kept saying that she was a dedicated and hard worker. "I'm dedicated to my job, babe." Ugh... "Babe, you should know that about me. I work very hard." Ugh...
Maybe it was because I was already annoyed at her, but it made me even angrier that she was lying to her "babe." I sat there trying to think of some way I could expose her. Was there something I could say that would give away her current location? I didn't come up with anything, and probably wouldn't have even done it if I had. I just sat there, getting more and more irritated.
After leaving the doctor's office, my next stop was the mechanic, to get an oil change. As I sat down in my second waiting room of the day, I couldn't help but notice the shrieking cries of a young boy. I also couldn't help but notice that he was lying down in the middle of the room, spinning around in a circle, as he screamed and yelled at the top of his lungs. His obese mother simply sat there ignoring him, a parental strategy that was proving ineffective in my opinion, but to be fair, I do not have any children. I thought about picking up the tyke and dropping him into the well below the cars being serviced, but decided not to do that. I just sat there, getting more and more irritated.
When the service was completed, the cashier notified me that because it was my car's first oil change, there was no charge. Perhaps my persecution that morning had all been worth it. As I walked outside to get my car, I looked up to see if the heavens had parted and a light was shining down on me. Sadly, that wasn't the case. Had it, I would have driven to the nearest convenience store and bought a lotto ticket. Instead, I simply got in my car and drove home.
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
A Critique of "Testing God"
http://dmccarthy618.blogspot.com/2011/11/testing-god-george-lucas-edition.html
I have to be honest, when I first saw the length of this story I felt a little bit overwhelmed. However, I enjoyed it very much. You did an excellent job creating suspense and keeping me wondering what was going to happen. The dialogue was excellent and very realistic (considering the unrealistic situation taking place). I wouldn't change anything about the conversation between Jack and Deborah. It was very fluid, believable and thought-provoking. You had me guessing how Deborah could possibly convince Jack to give up. As the story began, Jack certainly had the upper hand in the situation and you did a great job slowly turning the tables and building towards the climax where Deborah was finally able to convince him to shut down the forcefield.
My only suggestion would be to maybe add some more description of the characters and environment in the beginning. I had trouble picturing exactly where the story was taking place. Were they outdoors? Did it take place in the future or was it present day, where we are to believe that Jack got his hands on some kind of advanced technology? Perhaps a little bit more backstory? However, considering the story is very dialogue-centric, it's possible this isn't actually necessary.
Definitely a recommended read!!
Monday, November 14, 2011
Destiny
When they first arrived it was still morning. Hours had passed yet it was still not nighttime. However, they could no longer see where the ocean ended and the sky began. There was nothing but darkness, and the wind bristling through their hair was coming from that darkness. The faint chime of a buoy was barely audible over the sound of the waves, but they knew it was still out there, bobbing and floating, alone atop the current. There was something else out there, although what that was was still uncertain.
The young boy gripped the man's hand tightly. "Daddy, what are you looking at?"
"Not looking," he replied. "Waiting."
The surf was nearly at their feet. As each new wave bid farewell, the wet sand left behind inched closer and closer. The wind was beginning to pick up and the man could tell that the boy was growing restless. He felt the same way when he was the boy's age. He felt the same way when his father took him to this very spot so many years ago.
The boy began to shiver as he continued to follow his father's gaze. Staring out towards nothing. Although there was something.
"It's getting colder, daddy. We've been here forever."
"Forever?" he replied. "I said the same thing to my father when he took me here. I was full of questions as I'm sure you are now."
The boy had never met his grandfather. He knew that he died when his father was very young, but that was all he had ever been told about him. He wondered why his grandfather had taken his father to this beach just as he wondered why his father had taken him here on this day.
"What we're waiting for... has been here forever. But us? We're just a blip. We've barely been here for an instant."
Cold and confused, the boy didn't know how to respond. His father had always been mysterious and distant, but this was something different. For the first time in his life, the boy was afraid of him. For the first time he didn't know if he should trust him.
"What are we waiting for?" he asked, loosening the grip on his father's hand.
A soft rumbling sound began in the distance and grew louder and louder as the waves carried it towards them. The boy stepped back, but his father kept hold of his hand.
"Our family has many secrets. Things that I have purposely kept from you for many years." For the first time since they arrived, he looked down at his son. "You're old enough now to know the truth."
"Not looking," he replied. "Waiting."
The surf was nearly at their feet. As each new wave bid farewell, the wet sand left behind inched closer and closer. The wind was beginning to pick up and the man could tell that the boy was growing restless. He felt the same way when he was the boy's age. He felt the same way when his father took him to this very spot so many years ago.
The boy began to shiver as he continued to follow his father's gaze. Staring out towards nothing. Although there was something.
"It's getting colder, daddy. We've been here forever."
"Forever?" he replied. "I said the same thing to my father when he took me here. I was full of questions as I'm sure you are now."
The boy had never met his grandfather. He knew that he died when his father was very young, but that was all he had ever been told about him. He wondered why his grandfather had taken his father to this beach just as he wondered why his father had taken him here on this day.
"What we're waiting for... has been here forever. But us? We're just a blip. We've barely been here for an instant."
Cold and confused, the boy didn't know how to respond. His father had always been mysterious and distant, but this was something different. For the first time in his life, the boy was afraid of him. For the first time he didn't know if he should trust him.
"What are we waiting for?" he asked, loosening the grip on his father's hand.
A soft rumbling sound began in the distance and grew louder and louder as the waves carried it towards them. The boy stepped back, but his father kept hold of his hand.
"Our family has many secrets. Things that I have purposely kept from you for many years." For the first time since they arrived, he looked down at his son. "You're old enough now to know the truth."
A flash of lightening in the distance caught the father's attention, briefly revealing where the ocean met the sky. Another soft rumbling accompanied the flash, and as the sound dissipated into the void, so did the horizon.
The boy tugged on his father's arm. "Daddy, it's going to start raining. Can we please go home?"
"That's not a storm. And if we leave now, we won't have any home to go back to."
The beach had been full of life. People swam and sunbathed as they would on any ordinary summer day. The sky was so clear it allowed them to see the elipse of the earth. It was gone in an instant and took with it everyone that was there. The darkness arrived without a sound but the wind quickly began to pick up. The boy had turned to leave, but his father took his hand and led him to the shoreline. They stood there for hours without saying a word. Filled with terror, the boy now wished they hadn't started talking.
The howling of the wind grew deafening. They could no longer hear the sound of the ocean waves. At first the boy thought it was because of the wind, but soon realized that the entire shoreline was gone. The ocean was slowly disappearing into the horizon, leaving behind a darkness more striking then the sky above them. It was not the darkness of the abyss, rather something else. Something that began to rise. The boy was terrified and desperately tried to separate himself from his father's grasp.
"Try and remain calm. It can sense your fear," his father yelled over the roar of the wind. His gaze remained locked on where the horizon should be.
The creature was the size of the entire ocean. It was a site the boy could barely comprehend. It had no defining features nor shape. It was pure darkness and as it rose, it brought with it an indescribable sound. A sound the boy had never heard before. A sound that echoed deafeningly.
Suddenly, a bright light appeared in front of them. Almost like a doorway.
"You will know when your time comes. And at that time you must bring your son here, just as my father once brought me and his father once brought him. You must be brave and accept your fate." He released his son's hand and stepped into the blinding light before them.
The son reached his hands out to his father, but the light enveloped him.
He heard his father's voice one last time. "Your destiny and mine are different than anyone else's. You must face yours without fear, just as I am doing right now."
At last there was silence.
The wind stopped.
The sky turned blue.
The ocean returned.
The world remained.
The light disappeared. And with it, his father.
The boy tugged on his father's arm. "Daddy, it's going to start raining. Can we please go home?"
"That's not a storm. And if we leave now, we won't have any home to go back to."
The beach had been full of life. People swam and sunbathed as they would on any ordinary summer day. The sky was so clear it allowed them to see the elipse of the earth. It was gone in an instant and took with it everyone that was there. The darkness arrived without a sound but the wind quickly began to pick up. The boy had turned to leave, but his father took his hand and led him to the shoreline. They stood there for hours without saying a word. Filled with terror, the boy now wished they hadn't started talking.
The howling of the wind grew deafening. They could no longer hear the sound of the ocean waves. At first the boy thought it was because of the wind, but soon realized that the entire shoreline was gone. The ocean was slowly disappearing into the horizon, leaving behind a darkness more striking then the sky above them. It was not the darkness of the abyss, rather something else. Something that began to rise. The boy was terrified and desperately tried to separate himself from his father's grasp.
"Try and remain calm. It can sense your fear," his father yelled over the roar of the wind. His gaze remained locked on where the horizon should be.
The creature was the size of the entire ocean. It was a site the boy could barely comprehend. It had no defining features nor shape. It was pure darkness and as it rose, it brought with it an indescribable sound. A sound the boy had never heard before. A sound that echoed deafeningly.
Suddenly, a bright light appeared in front of them. Almost like a doorway.
"You will know when your time comes. And at that time you must bring your son here, just as my father once brought me and his father once brought him. You must be brave and accept your fate." He released his son's hand and stepped into the blinding light before them.
The son reached his hands out to his father, but the light enveloped him.
He heard his father's voice one last time. "Your destiny and mine are different than anyone else's. You must face yours without fear, just as I am doing right now."
At last there was silence.
The wind stopped.
The sky turned blue.
The ocean returned.
The world remained.
The light disappeared. And with it, his father.
Monday, November 7, 2011
My Haunted House
Everyone always said that the old Bosworth mansion was haunted. Over the years I've heard about curious children disappearing inside and couples being murdered while using the house as a secret rendezvous spot. I'm sure the majority of the kids in town love to make up stories about all the strange occurrences that might possibly have occurred there. Unfortunately, I've never been able to participate in these conversations because my family actually lives in the house.
You'd think it would be pretty cool to live in a gigantic mansion. There are ten bedrooms, twelve bathrooms, studies, libraries, kitchens and secret passages that take you from one room to others on the opposite side of the house. It should be the greatest hide-and-seek house on the planet, but all of my friends are afraid to come over. No one wants to be the next "victim". Do they really think my parents would allow any of them to disappear?
Some people in my position would probably become an obnoxious prick, believing they are better than everyone else at school. However, I feel the exact opposite sentiment. I'm embarrassed of where I live and the perception of my family. Truth be told, we are not actually wealthy at all. It's actually just dumb luck that my parents became the owners of the mansion.
At the end of his life, Old Man Bosworth lived in the house alone. He was very lax on the upkeep of the house, which resulted in overgrown shrubbery and a decaying-looking facade. From the looks of it, it's understandable that young children would believe it was haunted. My father, being an estate lawyer, was in charge of the old man's finances. Over the years, they became very close and because the old man had no living relatives, my father became the son he never had. When the old man died, he left the house to my father. Surprisingly, the old man was completely broke at the time of his death, but the taxes on the house were paid for for the next 100 years. This allowed my family to easily assume control of the deed.
I'll be honest, I was a little bit creeped out when we first moved in; even after the lawn was mowed, the shrubs cut down and the outside repainted. The house is enormous and having so many empty rooms creates a very ominous mood at night. However, at times my old house felt just as creepy, and that was one-tenth the size. Although one similarity between the two is that in neither one did I ever see a ghost.
You'd think it would be pretty cool to live in a gigantic mansion. There are ten bedrooms, twelve bathrooms, studies, libraries, kitchens and secret passages that take you from one room to others on the opposite side of the house. It should be the greatest hide-and-seek house on the planet, but all of my friends are afraid to come over. No one wants to be the next "victim". Do they really think my parents would allow any of them to disappear?
Some people in my position would probably become an obnoxious prick, believing they are better than everyone else at school. However, I feel the exact opposite sentiment. I'm embarrassed of where I live and the perception of my family. Truth be told, we are not actually wealthy at all. It's actually just dumb luck that my parents became the owners of the mansion.
At the end of his life, Old Man Bosworth lived in the house alone. He was very lax on the upkeep of the house, which resulted in overgrown shrubbery and a decaying-looking facade. From the looks of it, it's understandable that young children would believe it was haunted. My father, being an estate lawyer, was in charge of the old man's finances. Over the years, they became very close and because the old man had no living relatives, my father became the son he never had. When the old man died, he left the house to my father. Surprisingly, the old man was completely broke at the time of his death, but the taxes on the house were paid for for the next 100 years. This allowed my family to easily assume control of the deed.
I'll be honest, I was a little bit creeped out when we first moved in; even after the lawn was mowed, the shrubs cut down and the outside repainted. The house is enormous and having so many empty rooms creates a very ominous mood at night. However, at times my old house felt just as creepy, and that was one-tenth the size. Although one similarity between the two is that in neither one did I ever see a ghost.
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